Anxiety as a blocked impulse for action: what we can do about it
Recently, working with people, I have become more aware that anxiety has become an integral part of our lives. But what is really behind this feeling? And how can we turn it into something constructive? I would like to talk about this topic today.
Anxiety is an unrealised impulse
What if we look at anxiety differently, as if we were zooming out? What if we look at anxiety as an impulse to act, which we strongly suppress? Often, somewhere inside ourselves, we know what we want to do, but for some reason, we don’t do it. And it is this gap between desire and action that gives rise to anxiety.
There is a certain path between our desire and its realisation — let’s call it the search for a way to implement it. It’s simple when it comes to basic needs: I feel thirsty, I look for water, I drink.
But what happens with bigger impulses? Why are they blocked?
Where exactly do we block our impulses?
How can feelings block the impulse to realise? Let’s consider the feeling of shame. It happens in life that an entrepreneur knows that his business needs additional funding, but is ashamed to turn to investors or even to an expert or partners to expand his vision: “What will they think? That I’ve failed? That I’m a loser?” Sometimes shame becomes an obstacle that prevents us from realizing even what could actually make our lives better.
Another example of guilt. When a small business owner realises that they need to cut staff or change working conditions for the company to survive, but puts off the decision for months: “These people trust me, they have families, commitments to someone… How can I lay them off?”
Guilt freezes our decisions, leaving us in a state of limbo and uncertainty, where anxiety only grows.
Sometimes the most anxiety arises when there is something that a person is afraid of not being able to cope with or messing up. And then, instead of taking action, we choose safe waiting, which becomes frustrating over time.
What helps to deal with anxiety?
Decision-making is perhaps the most powerful tool. Perhaps now is the time to ask yourself: What can I decide today? Even a small decision reduces anxiety.
Another powerful method of dealing with anxiety is to unpack it. When we explore ourselves, our emotional intelligence expands through the differentiation of feelings.
Anxiety is often an undifferentiated feeling. What exactly are you feeling? Fear? Anger? Disappointment? Shame? Your option
An option for dealing with anxiety when we convert the impulse. Sometimes the impulse to act can be transformed into something that is available right now. For example, do you want to change your profession, but are afraid to quit a stable job? You can explore evening courses in the field where there is a lively enthusiasm for professional knowledge and deepening. Do you dream of starting your own business? Explore the field and the people who are involved in it, and perhaps try a small side job in this field in your spare time. This is a way to take the first step without much risk and give yourself time to understand if this is really for you.
Don’t forget about your body, it is our best assistant. Feel the movement through your body. Strength training for at least 30 minutes can convert momentum into creative action and channel it through the body. Physical activity helps to unblock what is stuck on a mental level.
And perhaps the most relevant skill right now is increasing tolerance for uncertainty. Especially when you are exhausted. Reading about people whose lives have been difficult helps me. Viktor Frankl, for example, showed how even in the most terrible circumstances, a person can find new meaning, give birth to new impulses, and act on them every day.
Equally important is the ability to distinguish between anxiety and fear.
Anxiety is sometimes a natural part of our lives if circumstances or events justify it. Fear is an applied feeling (flying, spiders). Anxiety is something broader, deeper, often incomprehensible: ” feel something, but I can’t define it myself.” Especially in times of uncertainty and difficult life circumstances, anxiety can have perfectly understandable causes. But even then, we can learn to work with it, unlock our impulses, and do what we can.
How can you help yourself?
- Identify your impulse: what do I really want?
- Find the blockage: what is stopping me — shame, guilt, fear? Visualisation through metaphor can also help.
- Try to identify the emotion and work with the specific emotion that is blocking you.
- Make a decision that you can make right now.
- Give your impulse an outlet through your body or action.
Anxiety holds the trigger button for our impulses in our own hands. And it is up to us to decide when to press that button.
If you feel that anxiety has taken over your life and it is difficult to deal with blocked impulses on your own, seek support. Sometimes, a professional outside perspective helps us see the blockages that we ourselves do not notice. And that is very valuable.
How are you doing with feelings of anxiety?
